I may not have written all 50,000 words and that is okay. You know why? Because I tried. I actually have written almost 20,000 words. 20,000 more than before NaNoWriMo. I also learned how hard it is to stay on track. Family life and issues constantly interfered and my own self doubts did me no favors, but I kept trying. And that is what matters more. Succeeding is the ultimate, but trying when you have all but given up on something is just as good. Trying is under rated. There are so many people who don’t even try because they know they won’t be able to get all the words done. But, what they don’t understand it is in the first steps, the first words they left on paper and didn’t delete that lead to the first paragraph and then the first complete page.
What I learned is that I can do it. There will be a day and time when I can get myself going and keep going. I am determined to do so. I will not give up on that part of my dream. To finish these three books I have dreamed about for years. Literally years. So afraid to write down what I see in my mind because I am afraid I will never get the words right to describe it. And the fear that no one will want to read it. The lectures and videos I watched during NaNoWriMo were inspiring and really helped me in working beyond my own fears. It was good to hear other accomplished authors say they worked through the same things I am working through. You know it in your head, but it is always different to actually see and hear someone say this. It seems to make it real. I am a visual and auditory learner to I guess that is why the videos do more to inspire me then just reading. And I also learned from others that it is an important part of writing to want others to like what you write, but it is also just as important, if not more so, to write for yourself. To get your thoughts and dreams out on that paper and leave them there. My delete button was calling to me on more than one occasion. But, I didn’t do it. Only to correct grammar or punctuation, I am kind of anal about that, but overall left everything intact.
I am going to continue with my writing and hopefully get a few pages out for people to read and see what they think. Once I get my courage up. There are so many fabulous authors and poets that I have met on Word Press and I know I will meet many more, at least I hope so. Thank you for sharing your creative thoughts, ideas and talents. May the new year bring more and more success to all of you. Love and Peace.